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Friday, February 12, 2010

Poems for Children and Odd Teenagers

Back in high school I was the odd woman out in the literary magazine club. While other members were writing about teenage angst: misunderstood genius, darkness, love forlorn, my subject matter included talking objects and animals behaving badly. The point of writing this way back then was strictly to amuse myself, and I did. This idea is revived in my Cat & Dog labels on the top navigation bar here. So I came across some of the old stuff today and I'd like to share it here because it still makes me smile, and I know you will too.

A Fresh Meal

Waiter, Waiter! I really should sue!
My tuna screams NO!
My steak just said Moo!
This crab won't let go of my shoe!
Crawfish are crawling up my shirt
If this is a meal, Oh wow, what's dessert?
With this deal I'd rather eat dirt!

My squid is squabbling with a scallop
There's a rat on a raft in my chowder
My baked sea horse is learning to gallop
While the dispute becomes louder and louder.

Three fat dumplings are having a duel
My lobster's a NARC in disguise
This clam says my soup is his pool
These crab cakes are telling me lies!

Waiter, Waiter, Take back this bill
Surely I won't pay the sum
You must cook this meal before I will eat
Really, you must think I'm dumb!

Loren Russell 1992

6 comments:

  1. Those poems are fantastic! I especially love the first one. It made me giggle and I can totally relate.

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  2. Goodmorning Caitysparkles, Thank you. You can relate to the first one? Oh wow, dinners must be exciting at your house. Hooray for winter break!

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  3. Those are cute! I started out by writing stories about my teddy bears, so I can relate. :)

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  4. ROFLOL! I'd say send it to a children's publisher but they might say it's not p.c.

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