Saturday, August 16, 2008

The Impropriety of Birds

Remember I said in an earlier post that birds won't come near the feeders? Now they're eating me out of house and home. If I fill all three feeders, the seed is gone in a day. This is ridiculous, or as the princess says, "ri-dick-oo-lous." If they keep eating at this rate, I'm not sure if we can afford to feed the birds.

The fact of the matter is, what's really annoying me is that they're starting to adopt a lazy and unappreciative attitude. Why should they work hard to catch worms if I'm constantly feeding them? I think I've spoiled yet another group of pets. Did I mention how they behave on the feeders? So far, I've tolerated uncensored chirping, public defecation, and bird brawls at all hours, while the children are watching at the windows.

The impropriety of New York birds is unreal, but it certainly makes watching them interesting. I think it's time to impart a little good, old-fashioned Victorian justice and suffering on these wild beasts.

I consider letting Hell Hound hunt and catch them in the yard ... Then I have a better idea. In the spirit of optimism, I give them one last opportunity to redeem their little characters. I post a sign on one of the feeders. Now, we'll see if the gluttony ends.

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Dear Internet Traveler,

Welcome to my writer's blog, started about six years ago for fun. Over time, the writing I have posted has ranged from personal reflection, to Long Island history research, to tall tales for my own amusement, to feature articles for local newspapers. As you can see from topics listed here, I travel in many mental directions in regard to interests. Click on the tabs and labels to explore my strange mind which senses that you may be having a criss-cross day. If so, perhaps this blog will distract you. However, please note that if you tell me my blog is beautiful just to get me to advertise rhinoplasty surgery and cheap drugs from Canada in your comment, I will ask the gods to give you a tail that cannot be concealed.


Loren Christie

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