Kindergarten:
Girls who play with blocks get marriage proposals. (Sorry Jason, I just wasn't ready to commit.)
First Grade:
The Justice System is flawed. Punching boys gets you in trouble, even if they did look down your shirt.
Second Grade:
Set the bar lower, and you'll get reward spots on a giraffe. Next time, to SECURE my spot, I 'll be sure to demonstrate how to make onion dip for the class, instead of writing and illustrating my own poem.
Third Grade:
While gluing cotton balls to a plate that will form the face of Santa Claus, the teacher informs us that he doesn't really exist. Thanks for clearing that up; I'm a better person today for knowing the truth.
Fourth Grade:
Nine Year olds can predict the results of an election. (Reagan beat Mondale in our class election.)
Fifth Grade:
An Act of God,(Hurricane Gloria), can ensure up to two whole weeks of no school. God is Great.
Sixth Grade:
Don't play Spin the Bottle with ugly people.
Seventh Grade:
Leave me alone; I'm trying to figure out this Rubik's Cube.
Eighth Grade:
Bad things happen when you soak your hair in lemon juice, slather on baby oil, and sun bathe.
Ninth Grade:
I am the hottest thing since sliced bread.
Tenth Grade:
Boys are evil. Thanks to Rave (super hold) hairspray, my hair defies gravity, and stays in place, even in tornadoes.
Eleventh Grade:
A person can fail a road test three times and still get a driver's license in NY state.
Girls who play with blocks get marriage proposals. (Sorry Jason, I just wasn't ready to commit.)
First Grade:
The Justice System is flawed. Punching boys gets you in trouble, even if they did look down your shirt.
Second Grade:
Set the bar lower, and you'll get reward spots on a giraffe. Next time, to SECURE my spot, I 'll be sure to demonstrate how to make onion dip for the class, instead of writing and illustrating my own poem.
Third Grade:
While gluing cotton balls to a plate that will form the face of Santa Claus, the teacher informs us that he doesn't really exist. Thanks for clearing that up; I'm a better person today for knowing the truth.
Fourth Grade:
Nine Year olds can predict the results of an election. (Reagan beat Mondale in our class election.)
Fifth Grade:
An Act of God,(Hurricane Gloria), can ensure up to two whole weeks of no school. God is Great.
Sixth Grade:
Don't play Spin the Bottle with ugly people.
Seventh Grade:
Leave me alone; I'm trying to figure out this Rubik's Cube.
Eighth Grade:
Bad things happen when you soak your hair in lemon juice, slather on baby oil, and sun bathe.
Ninth Grade:
I am the hottest thing since sliced bread.
Tenth Grade:
Boys are evil. Thanks to Rave (super hold) hairspray, my hair defies gravity, and stays in place, even in tornadoes.
Eleventh Grade:
A person can fail a road test three times and still get a driver's license in NY state.
Twelfth Grade: Did this year happen? ....Um, ... Oh, -Took extensive course at Taco Bell.
College, Undergraduate:
Complete Works of Shakespeare, USED: $135. 99......Watching your English professor dramatically act out excerpts of Hamlet with a heavy Indian accent: PRICELESS.
College, Graduate Degree:
Diploma= PAY RAISE!
Oh, Was I supposed to remember the curriculum?
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